im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize
