If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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