I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
