Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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