why didn't you poke me back
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
