My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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