Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
