This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My vagina is very pro this idea
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
