is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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