whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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