I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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