i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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