Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Randomize