come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
