The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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