Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize