i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
