He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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