i jhust puked up my retainher.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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