I just made out with a guy for $7.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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