you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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