Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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