We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize