I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
