She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
