I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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