I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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