Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
