With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
