At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Where is the hickey?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
