Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
