I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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