took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
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