Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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