it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
