i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize