i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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