he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize