Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
the condom got lost in my hair
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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