They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
