it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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