i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
