Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
