I like my sex mixed with concussions.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize