drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
