I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
