How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
