you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
