Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
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