Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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